Snarkvark @ PoliSnark.comAlright, let’s talk about the fucking clown show that is Colorado’s state legislature elections. You mean to tell me these candidates are raising millions of dollars for seats that pay around $35,000 a year? What kind of idiot signs up for that gig unless there’s a bigger payday somewhere behind the curtain? Spoiler alert: This whole thing is filthy with special interest money, and the real winners aren’t the voters—it’s the lobbyists and donors pulling the strings.
Let’s be real. You don’t sink $500,000 into a campaign to win a job that pays less than what you’d make slinging coffee full-time. Who the fuck is cutting these checks? This isn’t some altruistic “service to the people” nonsense—it’s a glorified lottery ticket for access to power. That power, by the way, comes with perks, influence, and backdoor deals that make $35k look like Monopoly money.
The candidates play the game, sucking up to unions, business interests, environmental groups—hell, probably Big Toothpaste too for all we know—just to keep the donations rolling in. Then, if they win, half of them resign within a few years anyway, probably burned out or with a cushy job waiting for them from one of the donors they were cozying up to. What a goddamn racket. It’s not about public service—it’s about who can buy the most ads, flood the most inboxes, and butter up the right interest groups.
Meanwhile, the actual legislation gets shafted. Want affordable housing? Nope, not profitable for the donors. Health care reform? LOL, unless it involves jacking premiums and boosting insurance companies’ profits. Every session turns into a tug-of-war between special interests, while the people of Colorado just try to keep their heads above water. But hey, at least we get to watch candidates pretend they care about us in TV ads, right?
If you think about it, this is like watching raccoons fight over a half-eaten sandwich—except instead of raccoons, it’s candidates fighting over a low-paying gig. And instead of a sandwich, it’s our future getting ripped apart. The few who do stick around try to make a difference, but they’re either ignored or steamrolled by the big-money machine.
So yeah, the whole thing sucks ass. Millions spent on meaningless campaigns for jobs no one wants to keep, just so the rich and powerful can keep the gears of influence greased. If you think any of this circus is about actual governance, I’ve got beachfront property in Aurora to sell you.
