Snarkvark @ PoliSnark.comAlright, let’s dig into this cash-soaked mess that’s the Colorado 8th Congressional District race. This thing is beyond filthy—it’s like someone invited a bunch of rich donors to an auction and put democracy up for sale. Between both sides, the race has already racked up over $20 million in spending. Super PACs are throwing money around like they’re in a Vegas casino, and let’s be real: nobody’s writing checks this fat without expecting a favor or two on the back end.
Democrats have thrown more than $8 million into the fight to keep Yadira Caraveo in office, with help from groups like the DCCC and a cryptocurrency-backed PAC called Fairshake (because nothing says “for the people” like crypto investors). Meanwhile, the Republicans are pumping $6.3 million into Gabe Evans’ campaign, with heavy backing from the Congressional Leadership Fund, a super PAC tied to Speaker Mike Johnson. But wait—there’s more! A bunch of shadowy “dark money” groups are also playing the game, funneling cash without revealing their donors. So yeah, this is democracy… or, at least, the very expensive version of it.
With all this filthy lucre flying around, the real question is whether Caraveo or Evans will end up representing the voters of Colorado’s 8th District—or the moneybags who just bought the damn seat. Spoiler alert: when super PACs and dark money are involved, it’s usually the latter. And let’s not pretend this is just an unfortunate side effect of modern elections—both sides love this system. It’s a win-win for them, as long as they get elected. But for the voters? Not so much.
And here’s the kicker: this level of spending in the 8th District could tip the scales in Congress, meaning all this money isn’t just about a local election—it’s a high-stakes battle for power in Washington. When the dust settles, will these candidates give a damn about the farmers and families in Weld County? Or are they going to focus on pleasing the donors who just bought them that cushy seat in D.C.? You know the answer.
Bottom line? This is a textbook case of money talks and voters walk. The system is broken, and the only thing we’re really electing is who gets to wear the “For Sale” sign in Congress. Good luck, Colorado 8th. You’ll need it.
